Posted 31.1.03 by Deirdre

Irate
irate
years of anger
days of hate
prolonged hours I can't relate
to joy, to strength, to peace, to you.
©2003 Nicholas White

Posted 31.1.03 by Deirdre

remembering why I can't be alone
Breaking everything around me when you're not around
Seems to numb my shaking hand that hit the wall just now
My eyes, red, view the hole I made just now.
Oh my God Change my shape like these weary, misplaced bones.
My voice is coarse from screaming that I am drifting through this storm.
the weight of who I am
sinks the ship that sails on shrinking dreams within my soul.
the wait for who I'm not
picks apart my very soul that rots.
I am shattered like the glass I threw at the door.
I will swallow remorse and wash it back with blood and tears.
God I hate the things I've done when I'm alone.
©2003 Nicholas White

Posted 29.1.03 by megan

Beautiful reality,
how blunt is your sting!
The final blows have yet to fall,
but my tears are enough to bring in the ocean's tide
Let me feel what's worthwhile, only to take it away.
You're a paradox full of cruel laughter,
and the irony leaves me aching inside.

(by Megan)

Posted 28.1.03 by Deirdre

from deep inside the marrow
I'm quite a freak show strolling down memory lane
come see the circus I've eaten flowers and pig brains
ants and locusts and menudo.
rabbit trails and silence can't keep skeletons inside my closet
but I wont come out anyway
no matter what they say, I am not gay
you can relax, it's okay
I'm no one but the man I am today
go straight off the paved road, turn onto the narrow
come feel my conscience burning from deep inside the marrow
©2003 Nicholas White

Posted 27.1.03 by Deirdre

wanderlust
is this thirst for an oblivion . restlessly beyond usurping from
his bottled up fears . and wasted years he cannot shake
countless time lost . times spent without you
kids wish dad had never left them
they miss him and infect him in hopes to see him change
dad asks would absence fix indifference towards his kids .
but regrets can't kiss them while they sleep . or remove the winter sheet
that covers their window view of life outside this pain.
he's the same . lalluping in rage . stays in a cage
he remains enamored with illusion . oblivious to his withering from the inside out
and poisons his childrens dreams of having dad around.
this is his wanderlust
©2003 Nicholas White

Posted 16.1.03 by megan

:: Unreachable ::

Beautiful girl are you empty inside?
Or is there some secret you're trying to hide?
Your facade is deceiving, your mask is crumbling
I can see through your eyes and find you within.
There's something inside you that I'll never know
Because you're running away in triumph,
as tears empty out your sweet smiles.
Empty girl are you ugly inside?

(By Megan)

Posted 14.1.03 by Deirdre

Michelle's Annie

flower girl, petals clasped gently in hand
they fall center aisle
and on her, every eye
Annie with an open hand sprinkles petals
all around

and you know that she's going away
but you know that she's not gone
and you smile just the same

Annie thinks of holding onto these flower petals
savoring the ending to this story
but this is a beginning
this is a beginning
©2003 Nicholas White

Posted 8.1.03 by Deirdre

laconic or not

where are the words
where are the voices singing
where are the words
where are the lyrics going

time and time again these songs they don't make sense
and seldom will my faith attempt to leap the fence

where were the words
where was the pithy comeback
where were the words
where were they when I needed them

time and time again I'm caught in numbness
and seldom will complaints begin to find the answers
yet again these songs will not make sense
nor the way dreams always let you down

(by Nicholas)
©2003 Nicholas White